Countdown

I just reviewed the latest Time magazine with the headline of, "The Best Photos of 2005". I guess another year has come and gone and from now until the end of the year we'll be bombarded with Top Ten lists of various topics and variations. Top 10 world events, top 10 songs of the year, top 10 Hollywood breaks up, top 10 foods eaten, top 10 things blogged about (ha ha) , top 10 blog sites (ha ha), just to name a few possible lists.

Reading through this magazine I was mildly disturbed by the photos I saw. Hurricane Katrina, tsunamis, earthquakes, London bombings, suicide bomings, war victims, etc. This year was particularly unsettling for me when I think about the severity of the natural disasters that impacted the world. I don't know where I'm going with this, except that now the image of a child buried under rubble after the earthquake in Pakistan, and the image of an ill Sudanese woman nursing her child are among the many photos that stir my heart in *that* way.

*sigh*

I think in some ways this blog was started as I began to see glimmers of emergence from the inward, self-focus I've had the last year or so. My "quarter life crisis" began with a realization that I was merely existing and coasting through life on my own shear will, not understanding that there is so much more to me than this secular life. As I sought truth and knowledge, I've come to believe in God and have come to form the basis of my faith and beliefs.

As my faith in God has grown, I look back on this year and realized that my self-focus is no longer about testing my faith or exploring those ideas, but now it's become a matter of putting those truths I've formed into practice and to translate them from the heart and the soul into everyday living. How do you trust that the routine of grocery shopping or driving to work has any purpose or meaning? How can you believe that goodness will come when you're in the midst of turmoil? Or how do you accept that your good intentions may actually offend someone that you meant no harm or ill will towards? There are a lot of these questions that I'm sure we are asking ourselves, but many of those questions are no longer life questions for me. I've lived the questions long enough to know that the questions are exactly the answers. That *is* the point of life.

Dunno if that makes sense to ya'all, but I see myself being able to see beyond me and who I am at the core. My views and thoughts are now moving towards an outward focus. How do I want to impact the world? How do I accept the fortunate place that God put me in when there are SO many unfortunate places I could have been placed? Where can I put my time and efforts to yield the greatest and most positive impact? More on this line of thought will be posted, for sure!

For now, 'tho...I bid you all a good night!

Sweet dreams!