Garden State Quote

“You'll see when you move out it just sort of happens one day, one day and it's just gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you get homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this rite of passage, you know. You won't have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for your kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people who miss the same imaginary place.”

This Thanksgiving brings with it mixed emotions for me. It's hard to go into details about it, but my trip to Europe was, in part, an attempt to fill the inevitable void and changes I haven't quite accepted going on in my part of the world. I want to go back and freeze time. A time when things weren't so complicated. When simplicity was just that. Simple. There's something unnatural about being intentional about simplifying. It's liberating when you make peace with that inner fear, but there's also an element of saddness when you realize you'll never get it back. You'll never get back that moment. That moment where you were ignorant about the critical juncture your life path was at. Where you were blissfully unaware of your life and the course you'd even take that would eventually lead you to where you're at.

It's true what they say. You can never *really* go home again. All you can do is redefine it's meaning and go from there. I hold dear the imprint that people have left on my heart, and I'm learning to accept that doing the same in return is really the only sure thing in life. Everything else is transitory at best.

Anyway...this is why I'm procrastinating with the packing (for those of you who care to know). By really getting into the packing means that I'm embracing the bigger meaning behind it all. The fact that this is my life, these are my choices, these are the circumstances I was dealt, and I had better be prepared for what's to come because it's the only life I've got, and I'd better make it a darn good one!